Sunday, 14 May 2017

Reader Survey.

Hello Readers,

As you know 2 weeks back, I took a break from blogging. There was just a lot going on. Now, I have some ideas of how to come back to blogging. Since, I have always been thankful of the blogging community, I'd be grateful if all my fellow bloggers filled out this form. And also, my readers, please help me out with this so that I can write better and at try to make you all happier while you read it.

Thank you so much!!



Monday, 24 April 2017

A Break.

         I have been blogging for over 2.6 years now and it has been an amazing journey. The girl who only scribbled in her diary about her boring life became the girl who published short stories that people could relate to. The amateur diary scribbler became a successful blogger. I never thought I'd be able to keep up with the blog for as much time as I have and now there's no looking back.

          I have written some personal stuff on my blog. But, I stopped those because I realised that no one needed to hear my story. I have written a few travel posts. But, that took a stop too because I get to travel only once a year. I wrote a lot about books and their reviews. But, over the last 2 years, I have read less than I used to read in just one month. But, most of all, I have written stories every Monday for the past 100 weeks. And now that I have achieved a landmark of 100 posts on my Monday Moments series, I want to pause and breathe. I want to celebrate how far I have come. I want to bring some changes in my writing and also on my blog. I do not want to stop writing Monday Moments because this was the only reason that made my Mondays worth of joy. So, no. This is not the end. This is going to be just a break until I can stop for a while and decide how to make myself better and how to make my blog better.

          Maybe I'll come up with more stories or a new series. Maybe I'll get the courage to travel solo and write some travel posts which I absolutely love to do. Maybe, or rather, hopefully I'll get back the love for my books and I start writing those reviews. Or maybe I'll decide to write full time. I really don't know. But, the one thing I am positive about is that I hope I'll find myself again in this exploration stage of becoming a writer that I want to be.


See you soon, readers. Stay with me.



Monday, 17 April 2017

Why Me? (Monday Moments #100)

Recently I watched '13 Reasons Why'. Obviously, it touched my heart and made me think. Before watching it, I had decided what my 100th post would be about and this just gave me reason enough. My earlier post was about love and the one before that was about friendship and earlier I have written posts about self-love as well. So, here goes the 100th one about mental illness.

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Every time she felt like staying home, she took the decision not to.
Every time she decided to decline a party invite, she took the decision not to.
Every time she thought of taking pills, she took the decision not to.
Every time she wanted to cry it out, she took a decision not to.
Every time she could've had a breakdown, she took a decision not to.
And because of every decision not to do it, every time she died a bit inside.


But, what was her fault? What was her fault that no one understood her? What was her fault that people made fun of her for something she couldn't control? What was her fault that everything just sucked? What was her fault that she had to go through it all alone? What was her fault for any of it?

She might laugh around people and crack existential jokes. That doesn't make her dark. That could be her way of using humour to deal with depression.

She might not portray her emotions all the time and might leave people in the middle of things. That doesn't make her weird. That could be her way of dealing with social anxiety disorder.

She might double check everything and she might not stand a spelling mistake. That doesn't make her rude. That could be her way of dealing with obsessive compulsive disorder.

She might not easily open up to you or might not want to adventurous things. That doesn't make her a loner. That could be her way of dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder.

She might be a chatter box and talk about everything. That doesn't make her a gossip. That could be her way of using people as something to deal with her pain.


She might be erratic. She might be selfish. She might be hard to comprehend. She might be a million different things. But, how you treat her is what she is finally going to be. You treat her kindly and she might get a reason to live. You treat her cruelly and you might take away her reason to live.

At the end of the night, her pillow is wet and in the morning her eyes sore. In the middle of the crowd her heartbeats are racing and in front of a crowd, her voice is mute. On the body are some unexplained cuts and in the soul are some unexplained pieces. At work, she has a fake smile and at home she has real tears. But at every moment, there is a constant question at the back of her head, "Is it all even worth it?"




(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)






Monday, 10 April 2017

Unambigious Deviations. (Monday Moments #99)


          They met on an online dating site and decided to meet for a first date without much meaningless texting. Instead of any usual first dates, they decided to do something else, something fun. They ditched the classy meal at a 5 star restaurant which involved sharing pleasantries, talking about the weather and cracking jokes they read on internet which could be used as ice breakers. Instead, they decided to go for Chinese takeout, sitting and eating in his truck, eating ice cream and going for a long walk in the Central Park while discussing what brought the shine in their eyes and what made their heart skip a beat. With the right people, this would work. And since they both were very excited about it, it naturally worked. 

          She was a cute 5'2'' heighted woman who wore black dress, let her grizzly hair down while she wore red high heels to match her wild personality. He was a tall and handsome man who wore a blue shirt to make his blue eyes more evident. He had blonde hair and fair complexion with a swimmer's body. She looked like a pessimistic night while he looked like an optimistic day. But, that wasn't the only difference...

          She told him how she had given up on men and being 32, this was going to be her last attempt at finding a partner. The brave woman in her told him how she would have no problem in living alone for the rest of her life. The kind woman in her told him how she did not want to have any kids. The passionate woman in her told him how she wanted to travel the world and never settle down. Instead of investing in an apartment in NYC, she wanted to invest in experiences and memories in different countries and make the world her home.

          And then, he told her how he could never live like her. The decent man in him told her how he needed people in his life and living alone would be worse than being unemployed or broke or homeless. One of his passions included having a family with many children. The devoted man in him told her how the thing that sparked him was stability in his life. The honest man in him told her how he would rather invest in an NYC apartment, stay in an average job in the same city around his family and focus on the little things and make one little home.

His want for stability conflicted with her want for travel.
Her want of living alone conflicted with his want of living around many people.
His want for a simple and corporate job conflicted with her want of being a travel writer.
But, her interest in him had no chance of conflicting his interest in her. After all, opposites attract.

          Later in the evening, she told him the story that made her decide on her career. He could empathize. He told her the story behind why he just wanted to be a common man. She could empathize. They talked about their love for books, music and Netflix. They talked forever and yet they never ran out of things to tell each other. It wasn't awkward. It was comfortable and lovely. 
After their long walk in the Park, they slept under the stars and discussed their fears. She feared that if she'd be with someone, she'd lose her independence. He talked about how he feared Alzheimer's disease. But, they both feared to be in love with someone where there was no future.

          When it was almost morning, they understood how they had no realisation how fast time had passed. They went to grab some coffee and have some serious discussion. It wasn't even essential to say it. It was clearly out there. They could easily love each other and have the kind of life that love stories are written about. But also, it wouldn't work because it'd involve compromises and resentment which would ultimately lead to a dull life. They stepped out and headed to different directions. But then, something was missing. They looked back at the other, came closer and kissed. They held each other for what seemed like infinity. It felt like they were soul mates but they had to search their own souls first. Finally, they went their own waves with some smiles, some tears and also some hope. She decided to keep this date as a last beautiful date and remember him as a caring man who would settle down with someone and that'd be enough to make him happy. And, he decided to think of himself first and to remember her as the fierce single-by-will woman who could grab some stars and that'd be enough to make her happy.



(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)





Tuesday, 4 April 2017

What Best Friend Is For. (Monday Moments #98)



          In the middle of their drinks conversation, Susan said, "I want to see you happy. And Ashton makes you happy." After listening to this, at that moment, Ashley said, "No. Look at me now. I'm insanely happy right now and that's only because of you, Susan. Ashton... He has rarely made me happy. He makes me sad more than the times you had made me happy. And that's saying something."

          And just like any other drinks conversation, this little chat would also be forgotten, but in that moment, Susan and Ashley both understood what they meant for each other. Even a minor thing that Ashton would do for Ashley would make her gloat with happiness and even though she knew that wouldn't last, she'd make herself happy. And even a minor thing that Susan did for her, was just what she did every other day because that’s just how it is.

          With her boyfriend, she had to make herself happy. But, with her best friend, happiness flowed without any thought, without trying. That's what best friends are for. They love you for all your crazy ideas and immature actions. They love you even when your priorities change and even when your personality changes. They love you even if you leave them or even when you stay. They love you even when you want to be left alone and even when you want to go for a party. They love you whether you talk daily or after months. Best friend’s love is the constant you have in your life. A best friend loves you, regardless. A boyfriend loves you, terms and conditions applied. So, yeah, that’s what a best friend is for. For everything.



(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)





Monday, 27 March 2017

When Quotes Understood Better Than Friends. (Monday Moments #97)


          On just another casual Saturday night, she was in her bed, watching marathons of TV shows as she browsed through Pinterest. Nothing sounded more fun to her than doing this. Most people would be out partying, dancing and socialising; but not her. She was fine in her shell, especially after what had happened...

          A few days ago, she had gone to college to take notes for exams. At that time, she met few of her friends. They were planning post-exam parties. They invited her too. It was not her thing but she went anyway because everyone pushed her to come and see the world outside books. Even when her heart was not in it, she couldn't take their taunts and dramas. So, she agreed, just to shut them up. She decided to go with the flow; not knowing that only dead fish go with the flow.
Of course, her exams went well. But, ever since that day she was more nervous about the party than about exams. Parties involved many strangers, loud music, uncomfortable conversations, no food, excess alcohol and everything she was not prepared for. She tried to hang around, talk to people she knew and managed to fake a smile now and again.

          40 minutes in, she went out. She could not take it. That was a sea of people and she was drowning. She could not do it anymore. The anxiety attack would have killed her, literally. She knew she did not need to prove anything to anyone. She knew it would be bad but she thought she might make it. But, she couldn't and that was okay. Instead of drowning and making herself acceptable, she decided to walk out and do something for herself. Instead of pretending to have a social life, she decided to stay happy alone. Those parties are just about meaningless gossip that never make her wonder about the deep secrets of her soul. That kind of social life only establishes around people who back-stab each other while still pretending to be friends. Those clubs are just dingy places where she could never get lost dreaming about her passions. Those friends were not important as she thought they were. Because, friends who don't understand her, have no right to be in her life. Friends who after knowing what she suffers through and don't empathize or care have no right to be in her life. What good are friends if they don't support you in times like these?

And so, when she read an amazing quote on Pinterest, it just made her eternally happy and meaningful to exist. It read:
"Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was up."





(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)





Monday, 20 March 2017

Was It Even Worth It? (Monday Moments #96)



Age 22:
She woke up. Went to her post-graduation convocation. After 17 years of education, she was ready to get a job, start working and earning.

Age 22 to 25:
She got up at 6 AM. Had her coffee and went for a jog. She came back, packed her lunch, had breakfast and left for office by 8 AM. She came back home by 9 PM. By 11 PM, she went to sleep.

Age 30-35:
She got up at 5 AM. Had her coffee and went for a jog with her husband. She came back, packed lunch for her, her husband and her son. She left home by 9 AM. She came back home by 7 PM. By 12 PM, she went to sleep.

Age 40:
She got up at 5 AM. Made coffee and breakfast for her family. Having become a home-maker she was home all day between 9 AM to 6 PM. She cooked, watched TV, read books on parenting and so on. She served her family dinner and went to sleep by 10 PM

Age 50:
She took a look at her life, and thought was it even worth it? Was her life even worth living? She got an education. She had a Ph.D. She was successful at her job. But, she left it for her 3 children and her husband. From being a career-driven woman, she went to becoming a house wife. And for any other woman, it would not be a demotion. It would something they cherished. But, for her, it felt like it was beneath her. Like, she had forgotten the kind of person she used to be.

She wondered whether she did anything worthwhile in her life?
Was it worthwhile to give up on herself for the sake of her family?
Was it worthwhile being loved rather than being successful?
Was it worthwhile to be someone she frowned upon?
Was it worthwhile to sacrifice for others and forget what she wanted from her life?
Was it worthwhile to marry the man she loved and settle down in one place rather than to stay single and travel the world?
Was anything worthwhile at all?




(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)




Monday, 13 March 2017

Falling Out of Love. (Monday Moments #95)


          She had loved him the most she could. She was there with him through his bad times and good. She crossed fires for him. She helped him through his breakup. She held his hand in his depression. She made him a major portion of her life. And now, after being so in love with him and yet not being together with him, she felt lost. She was fighting a war where she could see herself on both the sides. No matter who won, she was going to lose in the end. And now, after 2 years of that unrequited love, she was falling out of love of him. She was falling out of love with him and that realisation alone gave her a breakdown.

          On the other hand, he always considered her his closest friend. He loved her but he was not ready to be with her. He always took a stand for her. He directed her energy and passion in the right direction and helped her chose a career perfect for her. She was his security blanket and he was her angel. And now, after 2 years, he was ready to be with her post his traumas. He had just started to feel the love for her. He was going to confess his feelings on a planned date, but things never go as planned.

          She met him that day. She said, "I think I'm falling out of love with you. After waiting for so long, now I just don't have any feelings left for you. I love you and I want you in my life but now the definition of love has changed. I'm not going to be the hopeless smitten kitten and wait forever. And now, I don't have to because whatever I felt for you, is all fading away. I waited too long and now I'm moving on. I love you, but I cannot be your second choice anymore. And, I hate that I'm not in love with you anymore. I wish it was different." Then, he said, "I love you."

          They both held each other and cried because time screws everyone. Love is never enough. He was not sad that they failed. He was sad that he failed her.



(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)




Monday, 6 March 2017

It's Easier to Quit. (Monday Moments #94)



          It was simple to give up than to keep going. It was the easier choice. For an athlete, giving up practice for one day is simpler than going in the field to run for 8 hours. For a financial advisor, skipping one day is easier than going to his office to work for 12 hours. For a writer, giving up on that novel which they have been working on since 2 years is easier than to finish it.
          At any moment in anyone's career, it is easier to give up than to continue. It is easier to stop than to put in effort. But, after all, there is no glory in giving up. There's no thrill of success in the ease of quitting. Sometimes things might seem easier to do but there's no accomplishment in doing that.
          You must keep going even in the lows. The highs will pass by quickly because it will be a good time but the lows will get stretched out because there's no fun in them. The lows will make you want to quit but at that time, it's important to remember why you started. It is always easier to quit but it's of no use.



(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)




Monday, 27 February 2017

Just You. (Monday Moments #93)


          It is because of those sudden moments that either leave you surprised or shocked. Those surpirses when your friends show up at your home at 12 AM because it's your birthday. Or those surprises when your boyfriend shows up at the foot of your building at 3 AM just because he wants to see you. Or those surprises when your family is home for the weekend without any prior notice. Or those surprises when your cousins stay over at your place just to have fun and catch up. Or those surprises when your best friend takes you for an adventure in the mountains on a whim. Or those surprises when your boyfriend plans the perfect way to propose, just the way it is in your favourite novel. Or those other thousands of surprises that your close people give you just to make you feel special.

         And then, you get a surprise from all of them, together, like a shock disguised in surprise, when none of them is there for you when you need them. That's when you realise your friends show up at 12 AM because it is kind of their job to do so. That's when you realise that your boyfriend wants to see you at 3 AM just to tell himself that he cannot do any better than you. That's when you realise that your parents are there because now they need you. That's when you realise your cousins got kicked out of their homes and just needed a shelter. That's when you realise that adventure in the hills was really just what your best friend needed to make her feel sane again. That's when you realise that the proposal was that way because it was his favourite movie adaptation. That's the thing about surprises; they are a shock in disguise.

          You think people love you and care for you. But, at the end of the day, all that's left is you. Because apart from those thousands of surprises, there are millions of shocks. There are millions of moments when you fall apart alone, in the four walls of your lonely house and realise that surprises are just as crap as fantasies. And that people are not kind; they are selfish. That there is always a hidden motive to every surprise. And that, at the end of it all, all these people are just a part of your life; not your entire life. At the end of it all, it's going to be just you.


(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)




Monday, 20 February 2017

Traumatised. (Monday Moments #92)


          She woke up screaming and shouting, only to realise that she had the same nightmare again. It was the same thing again and again and again. Even though it had been 7 months since she survived the airplane crash, it wasn't easy. It could never be easy for her. Being the sole survivor, comes with the survivor's guilt, no matter whether right or wrong. She tried to calm herself down for the next 10 minutes. She glanced at the poster that hung in front of her bed that read, "Everything is going to be okay." She kept saying those words back to herself until they sunk in. She stood up and checked that all doors were locked and windows closed. She went to the hall and she saw that the arrangements on the coffee table were different. Did she change those and couldn't remember? Or someone else was in her home? Or was she sleep-walking again? At that instant, she heard her maid come in and she was aghast by her rapid entrance in the room. Only a while later did she realise that she had been yelling with her eyes closed and hands over her head and sitting in the middle of the room crying. Her maid helped her and tried to relax her with some anti-depressants. She kept saying those words back to herself;
"Everything is going to be okay...
Everything is going to be okay...
Everything is going to be okay..."

          She got through the day somehow; crying, vanishing, surviving, living. At some moments, she felt like she had nothing left in her life because all the people close to her had died. At some moments, she felt like she should've died too because living this life felt meaningless. At some moments, she wanted to get her wings back because the wanderlust girl was trapped in the walls of her own frail body and anxious mind and empty soul. At some moments, she just wanted to go back in time and cancel the airplane tickets and go to her destination wedding by train with all her relatives and her fiancĂ©. At some moments, she wanted to sneak to heaven to say goodbye to them all while at sometimes she just wanted to rot in hell. But, at all moments during her life, she felt like she was disappearing. Disappearing from the face of earth. Disappearing from everyone's lives. Disappearing from her own self. Just, lost.


(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)







Monday, 13 February 2017

Weekly Inspiration. (Monday Moments #91)


         While she worked the entire week, she also taught on weekends. Her life wasn't a walk in the park. She was the kind of woman who was a workaholic and loved to keep herself busy. She was a sucker for knowledge and dedicated to reading. Even if she was career-driven and hardcore, sometimes she had her own struggles. This was why she taught classes on weekends. In most of her classes, she had students who came just for attendance or to get notes for exams. But, in one class, she had this one girl student. She knew that that girl loved her. She knew that she had the potential to go very far. She knew that she would turn out just like herself. She saw herself in her. And whenever she had an existential crises, she would think of that one student. And somehow, it kept her going. She had a class that day, she was explaining her drowsy students how it is out there. She was agitated with the kind of presentations they gave. So, she had to make them understand.

          "In this college, you are protected by us, we cover up for your mistakes. But, once you go out there, there's no scope for mistakes in the corporate world. You people have access to all resources and instead you waste your time on social media. You waste your time sleeping for 8 hours. You only need 4 hours. I do that. And that's how I get more time. Time to read. Time to do research. Time to teach! Understand what your USP is. What's your x-factor? What's the thing that sets you apart from any other person? And once you know what it is, unleash it."

          And then she looked at her favourite student. The sparkle that she had in her eyes and the determination which celebrated on her face gave her the inspiration to keep going. Somehow, while inspiring her, she got herself inspired. That's the thing about being a teacher. You don't look at 99 indifferent students. You invest in 1 sincere student. These weekly classes gave her a hope about the future; only because of one student. She felt like herself whenever she saw herself in that girl. And that became their both’s weekly inspiration.




(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)






Monday, 6 February 2017

Keep Going. (Monday Moments #90)


          She was a blogger. Her blog wasn't like most other fabulous blogs which are about fashion or food or lifestyle. She was a writer. She wrote short stories and she enjoyed writing them. Be it about new found love or cold wars between friends or a heartbroken state. She could paint a picture that her readers could imagine in their minds. She made her women characters intelligent and brave. She made her male characters caring and understanding. She often weaved a story which was inspired by her own life, people in it and similar circumstances but with a dramatic note to make it readable. Because, no one wants to read about friends who are having a cold war, instead they love politics in the friends circle. Because, no one wants to read about the couple who are in an almost relationship since a year, instead they want a happy couple with silly fights and probably a tragic ending. Because, no one wants to read about almost somethings, but something whole. So, that's why she changed the 'almost somethings' in her own life into a 'whole something' in her story.
          She had been blogging since 2 years. And now with her new job which took a lot of time and energy, she had been devoted less to writing. She knew it sucked. But, if she didn't write, life would get sucked out of her. So, that day, in order to continue her series, she wrote something bizarre, something totally random. Anyway, normalcy seemed too cliche and it was not her style. Her genre was weird, exactly like her. And just like that, words flew, words typed, story created and soul satisfied. There were a million things she could write about, but instead, for once, she wrote her own almost-story which ended up being whole because of her readers.


(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)





Monday, 30 January 2017

Loving Someone Who Can Never Be Yours. (Monday Moments #89)


          The day he first saw her, he knew she was was a deeply happy person. The kind who dressed in bright colours with a constant smile. The kind whose eyes easily let out her emotions. The kind who carried herself confidently. The kind who never feared to make eye contact with strangers. The kind who knew how to fly and make other fly with her. He knew she was going to create a thunderstorm in his life. The day they met, they talked to each other and became friends. Soon enough he understood that she was committed. Usually, if you know this tiny detail at the beginning, it is easier to detach or refrain from having any feelings for the other person. But, in his case, those feelings just grew. He was sad for himself but he was happy for her. Because her love story was so amazing and pure that it made him realize what love looked like in real life. Every day he spent with her, he was more himself. He loved that she understood him like no one else did. He loved that she argued with him on many inconsequential things. He loved how sorted her life was and how clear her goals were. He loved everything about her. He was in love with her. Beyond all reason and logic, he fell in love with her. She indeed created a thunderstorm in his life.

For an intelligent man like him, it was unusual for something like this to happen to him. But, we can't help who we fall in love with. And so, he had decided. It was okay to love her. It was okay to love her even though she would eventually marry someone else. It was okay to love her even though she would never feel the same way for him. It was okay because his unrequited love had given him everything he didn't have before. Because of this unrequited love, he could feel happiness, he could understand himself on a different level and somehow it made him value himself more. He knew that theirs wasn't a love story or something of a love triangle and he was okay with that. Because, just sometimes, when you find your soulmate, even if they can’t be your life partners, you sure as hell can’t let them out of your life. So, yes, it's okay if you love that person that can never be yours.




(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)




Monday, 23 January 2017

Professional Life Over Personal Life? (Monday Moments #88)


          Cristina, an architect, spent 6 days a week working on a new project. Just like every other project, it was taxing and left her exhausted. In architecture, the early days where the main blueprint and design is to be prepared is the vital part and also the most challenging. She spent her life building homes for strangers while she herself lived in a rented apartment. She loved her job but just sometimes she would get lonely.

          Meredith, an HR Executive, spent 6 days a week working for an MNC. Being into recruitment, her job was to find right person for the right job. She would ask which job location they preferred, how much salary they expected, what was their experience. She would also ask about their family background, at times. She gave jobs to people where ever they wanted while she was tied down at one place. She would hire them at such a high salary which she might never earn for years. She gave people things which she didn't have herself. She loved her job but just sometimes she would get lonely.

          Isobel, a surgeon, worked 70 hours a week. Sometimes she would have 48-hour shifts while some times night shifts and at times she was called in because some drastic casualty lead to multiple patients. Being a 4th year resident interested in neurology, she had to be on top of her game. She had to log on the hours in the operation room and also had to study for the boards. She cared for her patients like they were her family and friends. It was funny how she looked after them so much but at the end of the day, they'd thank her and leave. She loved her job but just sometimes she would get lonely.

          On a Sunday night, Cristina, Meredith and Isobel were having pizza and beer in their tiny apartment. These three workaholic roommates only spent Sunday evenings together. In common, they had no social life and so they had found peace at their jobs. Cristina knew that at the end of the day, she'd build a beautiful bungalow for a family, which she'll never have. Meredith knew that at the end of the day, she'd give the perfect job with perks and incentives to candidates, which she'll never get. Isobel knew that at the end of the day, all the patients she cared for would go back to their lives, which she did not have. In the race of being the best in their profession, they forgot about their personal lives. After all, the family in the new bungalow or that new employee or that patient won't be there for them even when they burned sweat and blood for them. That's because personal life triumphs over professional life.




(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)




Monday, 16 January 2017

Changing Priorities. (Monday Moments #87)


          Within a span of a year, his priorities changed frequently and consistently. When he was in a dead-end relationship, he loved her more than he ever had before. She was his priority and nothing else mattered. But, then she left him. Although, he was emotionally damaged, he tried to focus on his new job. After a few months, his priority became his career. He wanted to achieve something and prove himself. But, the reason behind this thrive was mislead. This is why his job became monotonous for him. He became really good friends with a girl who understood him more than he did himself. But, at that time, he ignored her and prioritized his friends. He also told her how he had to focus on his career when he clearly wasn't doing that either. Then, the friends who were his priority left him. Then he realised he should've held on to the girl who loved him. And now that he wanted to prioritize his relationship, she was long gone.

When he should've prioritized his career, he prioritized his meaningless relationship.
When he should've prioritized his friends, he prioritized his boring job.
When he should've prioritized his true relationship, he prioritized his fake friends.
When he should've prioritized himself, he let all others walk over him and let go of the one person who actually cared.

Maybe that's why, you should just keep yourself as a priority rather than being others'.




(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)



Monday, 9 January 2017

Disconnected. (Monday Moments #86)


          She had a few groups of friends; school mates, college mates, constant friends and a couple of new friends. She used to hang out with them from time to time. She had a different equation with each one of them and her own style changed as per the group she was with. With her school friends, she somehow became an intellectual who used big words and talked about how she was still pursuing her dream. With her college friends, she became a person obsessed with movies, TV serials, singers and bands. With her constant friends, she felt free. She didn't have to think twice before saying anything. And finally, with her new friends, she was still discovering who she was and realised she could be crazy, smart and emotional at the same time.

          No matter what, she always loved her friends. She would always take their advice on important matters. But, when she met her school friends a couple of years ago, she felt lost. She found their discussions and gossips utterly boring. They had changed over time but they still liked to talk about childish things that didn't matter. She felt disconnected.
          She met her college friends about 8 months ago, she felt lost. They only talked about things like fashion, who's dating whom, who broke up with whom and all the who's who of human crap. She felt disconnected.
         Along the past few months, she met her constant friends almost every week. But, somehow, they felt distant too. They had started to judge her decisions and instead of standing by her during tough times, they were too busy with their own lives. She felt disconnected.
          And when she only had her couple of new friends left, she knew that nothing could ever happen between them. She knew they would never leave. But, then, they were having dinner one night, and she had nothing to say. She got bored. She felt disconnected.

          As she walked home alone that night, she was lost in the vortex of her intense thoughts. She couldn't figure out how she could feel so disconnected with all of her close friends. She couldn't understand if it was something she did or how she behaved. She wondered whether she felt disconnected with all the close people in her life because she was disconnected with herself. Did she need to connect with herself first in order to connect with others? Or was she so peaceful being alone, that the company of others had become unbearable? If she enjoyed solitude, was that the reason everyone kept leaving her? She was just lost in her thoughts.  She knew, whatever happened, at the end of the day, she had to take the walk alone.



(‘Monday Moments’ is a blog series wherein I write about an incident or a moment in a short paragraph. It’s not a story, but just a short description to express and explore the most common joys and also the uncommon miseries.)





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